Everyone knows that Minecraft is a video game sensation. It has sold over 2.5 million copies of the game and it has made an estimated 33 million USD. This normally wouldn't impress but the fact is, this game is a BETA. For anyone that does not know what this means, it means this is not the full game yet, it is still in development. But for developer Notch, the ride is not quite over yet. At E3 2011, Minecraft was announced to have a winter debut as a console game on the 360 with Kinect support and a mobile version is also supposed to make an entrance (not announced at E3).
Well, there, now that we have the blistering success story of this game safely tucked away in our brains, we can move on the actually review.
The only reason I played Minecraft was because two of my friends were constantly telling me how great of a game it is. Well, I decided to buy the game and try it for myself. One thing that you need to know about this game is that there is absolutely no tutorial. In the regular Beta download it at first seems as though your objective in this game is to exist. I figured out how to punch things and realized I was able to put blocks back down in other shapes and I realized I could break a few things down. Then, I decided this wasn't a bad game to actually look up the FAQ. And its not, there is absolutely no shame in looking up the FAQ. Then it became night in the game. And when the first creeper blew up half my house I said, "wow, not going to let that happen again". Then guess what? It HAPPENED AGAIN! That was just my first impression of the game, after the first week or so, my experiences with the game improved and I felt much more secure about running around with the monsters.
Then I got around to actually building something that was great and I decided to recreate this on a multiplayer server so that my friends, and others who happened to walk by could see this. Now, Minecraft with others is fun, but finding a server that actually is worth playing on is harder. The multiplayer is so buggy that in some servers you literally can't move away from the spawn point. Others are better and some are great. Well, there are more problems unfortunately, and that would be that a large portion of the general populace being full of assholes and dicks. The reason they are a problem is that when you find a server you wouldn't mind playing on, they grief. What grief means, is that they go to something you have built, and they destroy it so they can take the materials for themselves. If you do join a multiplayer server, the best advice I can give you is to go as far away from the spawn as at least four Minecraft days. Otherwise, you will constantly be griefed. However, there good servers out there that can be moderately grief free and I encourage you to find them because the online function of this game makes it much better (without constant griefing that is).
Here's the nitty gritty, whether or not the game is good or bad in my opinion... I say Minecraft is an amazing experience for many gamers of all ages and I say get it, but it isn't without flaws, just like everygame. It isn't like me to just say something is good, bad, atrocious, fantastic, or the best over I'll give my reasons for both. The game is great in the fact that the controls are very easy to master. My nine year old brother is able to play this game without needing any help at all, seriously, it's that easy. The random world generator is amazing, it never ceases to amaze me that the game can spit out a new world anytime I tell it to, and not only that, it makes it unique from the last one. This feature leaves infinite possibilities to create your structures wherever you please. Also, the structures you can build seem to be infinite as well, with many colors of wool you can create pixel art; the graphics seem to charm us all with the every minuscule pixel; with either hard work or the world generator you can make an entire floating city; with Nether Portals you can create masses of buildings in a hellish underworld; there are possibilities for underwater bases and cities; and there are over 100 building blocks to do this with. With all this good, there really isn't much to nitpick..... that doesn't mean however, that I won't nitpick.
Luckily, the negatives are far less in number. As mentioned earlier, the multiplayer is buggy and griefing is really unavoidable. The problem stems from the servers being ran by someone in their house on their own computer. If they are hosting on a laptop (minus Alienware and other top gaming PC's) it will lag, also if they host the server on the same computer they play on it is likely to lag as well. A possible solution is to have servers that Mojang run, be dedicated to run multiplayer servers. Or when it hits the 360 it may run just like any other XBL games do and Microsoft will run the servers.
Now we're at the biggest flaw to the game... and it isn't even really a flaw, just a note for those who don't have the game and plan on getting it. There will be times that you will not play Minecraft for weeks because it is a PROJECT GAME. Do not get this game because you think it will be fun to dig a hole in the ground and just mine outwards from there. When you get this game, build something, anything. It can be a giant replica or a breadbox if you want but just for your sanity, build something. It is a game with no objectives therefore calling it a game really doesn't compute with the mind but it is a game, trust me. The trick is to make your own objectives (i.e. "I am going to build a castle that is 80x80 blocks and fill it with nothing but paintings out the wazuu"). However, because there are no objectives, there is nothing you absolutely have to do, and therefore when you do not have a project you merely just exist in the game. Yes at first, you must build some resemblance of a shelter but then like I said, make your own objectives.
So remember, loading Minecraft without planning on building something would be equivalent to whipping out your pecker and beating off to a completely blank sheet of computer paper and doing so without a thought in your mind.
Score: 9 Diamond Pickaxes out of 10
Green’s Take:
Minecraft is the first game on the chopping block and I think I’m going to start off by getting the bad, what little of it there is, out of the way. The biggest complaint about Minecraft is the complete lack of direction the game gives you. You click the go button and you placed into a very blocky representation of the world as yet untouched by human hands. While it is true that the complete lack of direction issue is slightly resolved by the new-ish addition on the achievements it doesn’t tell you how to do any of the things that get you achievements so it honestly wouldn’t help many people. It’s roughly like I’m playing Zelda and then Navi in her annoying little voice tells me go through the door. However she doesn’t tell me the tree to my left is hollowed out and could easily be cut in half with my sword and I could then collect the key to the door. Now I do grant that it’s true that given the prompting of the achievements most people would be capable of figuring out how to get a pick before night falls. However, the achievements don’t prompt the creation of what is arguably the most important item in Minecraft: torches. Because very soon, you poor new minecrafter, night will fall and all manner of evil will descend upon you eagerly tearing at your nipples to see who can get the first bite.
Minecraft presents itself with a bit of a learning curve that can at times be so steep and jagged it seems that only the most elite among the residents of mincraftia could ever possibly hope to scale it and even then not without a stack of ladders, a diamond pick, and quite a large quantity of TNT. But if you do manage to scale the learning curve and gain an understanding of how all the bits and baubles of Minecraft work it’s really fucking fun! I have before sat down thinking okay all I need to do is got cut down some trees and collect some wood then I’ll go eat. Three hours later I’ve completely redesigned my house, mined all the way down to bedrock-striking three lava flows and two caves which will definitely need exploration later- cut down an entire mountain so that I can have easier access to my fishing hole and killed several farms worth of livestock to get there various drops and you know what not a single block of wood found its way into my inventory nor have I eaten.
I’m not calling it a problem but I do think I should point out it’s exceedingly easy to get sidetracked in Minecraft. In fact I find this particular concept a point in the games favor because many games a so bloody linear there isn’t even a place to get sidetracked. Minecraft goes quite the opposite route tearing up the main track entirely so it can be used to build a rollercoaster and replacing it with only a single word: Survive. If Minecraft were to have a goal this would be it however Minecraft has found a way to completely abolish having a preset goal and I applaud this. Minecraft doesn’t need to have a goal do to the sheer degree of things the player can do which will inherently lead to the player creating his or her own goals. That’s right his or her. Minecraft is a game even your lady friend might like! Assuming of course you life hasn’t been completely devoured by Minecraft and you still have a lady friend.
I’m not calling it a problem but I do think I should point out it’s exceedingly easy to get sidetracked in Minecraft. In fact I find this particular concept a point in the games favor because many games a so bloody linear there isn’t even a place to get sidetracked. Minecraft goes quite the opposite route tearing up the main track entirely so it can be used to build a rollercoaster and replacing it with only a single word: Survive. If Minecraft were to have a goal this would be it however Minecraft has found a way to completely abolish having a preset goal and I applaud this. Minecraft doesn’t need to have a goal do to the sheer degree of things the player can do which will inherently lead to the player creating his or her own goals. That’s right his or her. Minecraft is a game even your lady friend might like! Assuming of course you life hasn’t been completely devoured by Minecraft and you still have a lady friend.
I could certainly spend all day ranting and raving about all the exploits I’ve had in Minecraft or go into an entire three volume novel series about the evil behavior of creepers but I digress. In the end Minecraft is a fuckin great but you must know one thing before diving in head first and handing over all the time you haven’t already promised to something else: You need to set yourself goals in Minecraft or you won’t like it. I love Minecraft, but I won’t play Minecraft of I don’t goal because I’ll just end up milling around not really doing anything other than wasting time.
However, if you do find yourself wandering about in Minecraft without an actual goal at least you’ll never have to see the same scenery twice. If you were to walk in a straight line from the center of the map to a place that has been named the “Far Lands,” which are essentially the edge of the map, it would take over a month. That’s not a joke. From the center of the map the “edge” where the map doesn’t even end, but just gets really buggy would take over a month of time if you did nothing but walk in a straight line and didn’t die, or get distracted, or turn, or pass out from sheer boredom. And a completely unique map this fuckin huge can be generated a click of a fucking button.
I’m really starting to ramble here so two final points:
1. Multiplayer is even better than single player if you can find a server that doesn’t totally suck; most do.
2. Where the hell is silver Notch!?
10 pixel rendered penises out of 10
However, if you do find yourself wandering about in Minecraft without an actual goal at least you’ll never have to see the same scenery twice. If you were to walk in a straight line from the center of the map to a place that has been named the “Far Lands,” which are essentially the edge of the map, it would take over a month. That’s not a joke. From the center of the map the “edge” where the map doesn’t even end, but just gets really buggy would take over a month of time if you did nothing but walk in a straight line and didn’t die, or get distracted, or turn, or pass out from sheer boredom. And a completely unique map this fuckin huge can be generated a click of a fucking button.
I’m really starting to ramble here so two final points:
1. Multiplayer is even better than single player if you can find a server that doesn’t totally suck; most do.
2. Where the hell is silver Notch!?
10 pixel rendered penises out of 10
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