This post will cover Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter and Brave both of which are still in theaters if you want to go see them and since the rush is over now that they've been out for a bit, getting a ticket should be easy.
Brave
So then Brave, it's a Pixar movie. And honestly I feel like I can stop here. Brave is a movie that exists, at least in my opinion, only cause one exec at Pixar turned to another and said "Hey Jerry, my money throne feels a little shorter then usual. We should make another movie." So they did. Pixar made another movie and there's nothing remarkable about it. It's not bad by any means, it's just absolutely run-of-the-mill. Maybe I remember the older movies fondly cause I was a child and easier to impress, but this was just bland.
Plot
Some viking princess is coming of age and her mother expects her do do exactly what she's told and give herself to which ever young viking lad can best fire an arrow, since apparently women are worthless here despite the queen clearly running the place and not the king. But that was probably done intentionally so that the women wouldn't look totally useless. Anyway the chick tries to weasel out of getting married, her mom gets mad, there's a tooth-rottingly sweet moral at the end and everyone lived happily ever after.
Now I don't think Pixar makes bad movies; I can't think of even one movie Pixar made that I would call bad and tell people not to see it. That being said, this is the worst Pixar movie I've ever seen. The whole thing just reeks of not caring at all and just pushing out anything for us to lap up like hungry dogs just cause it's from Pixar.
Unless you really wanna go to the movies and have seen everything else even remotely interestingly sounding, don't see this.
4 utter cash-ins out of 10
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire HunterIn contrast to Brave, I liked this one. Now quick point to anyone who read the book and wants to see it cause of that; this movie takes almost nothing from the book apart from the title and the absolutely most basic level of the concept. Pretty much everything beyond that is different.
Plot
As a young boy Lincoln sees his mother killed by a vampire, and vows to kill as many of the blood-sucking fiends as possible. Along the way he meets a man named Henry who trains him how to fight and equips him with the weapons needed to kill the beasts of the night. Ultimately he decides he must get into politics, you'll see why, to truly destroy the vampire infestation in America and sets about doing just that.
So like I said before, It takes really nothing from the book, which I did read and thoroughly enjoy. Normally This would annoy me, but thinking about it the layout of the book really just does not line up with the typical action curve of a movie. In the book the entire last third of it is pretty much just Lincoln becoming president and dealing with the vampires through politics and not the head of an axe.The book is charming and witty and I'd recommend it if it sounds interesting, but I'm talking about the movie right now. The movie does still have Lincoln become president but most of it happens off screen since people came to see Lincoln swinging an axe not pushing papers. This also leads to and epic finale throwdown that was entirely non-existent in the book. The movie is well done and its a fun concept; Abraham Lincoln fought fucking vampires. It's not amazing, but it's a good time.
7.5 tragic origin stories out of 10
P.S. I really wanted to make this **SPOILER axe-guns! SPOILER**
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